Strategies for Caring
The following suggestions are intended to assist in building strong communities at the University of Notre Dame, in which all students have the opportunity to learn about themselves. They were originally presented to Hall Staff members (RA's, rectors, and assistant rectors) during Hall Staff Orientation. However, these suggestions, in conjuction with the numerous other University resources, can be utilized by all members of the University as a means to personally enhance the environment at Notre Dame.
1. Object whenever and wherever you hear jokes and disparaging comments about homosexual persons.
2. If a student “comes out” to you, listen. The importance of just listening cannot be overestimated. Unless you are gay, lesbian, or bisexual yourself, you cannot really understand the experience of the student revealing their sexual identity to you. However, your understanding, as a Notre Dame student and a human being is invaluable because it supports the student in his or her own self-acceptance and furthers the integration of sexual identity into their overall sense of self. Often you are a friend and the student fears that this revelation will end the friendship. Your response of attentive listening and personal acceptance provides reassurance and furthers the friendship.
3. Realize that a student who has “come out” to you has entrusted to you an intimate part of their identity. Since sexual identity, be it heterosexual or homosexual, while integral to who we are, does not define us, make a point of maintaining normal contact with the student that involves the daily round of life in the hall and on campus. This could be as simple as casual conversation.
4. Confidentiality is crucial. Information about someone's sexual identity is shared with no one unless specific permission is given by the person who shared the information with you.